If we’ve learned anything this shit-show of a year, it’s what great company houseplants can be. We’ve also learned how important sex toys have become now that we’re stuck inside our homes, unable to enjoy those spontaneous sexual encounters we value oh so much (though gay and bi men in America reportedly had an average of 2.3 more sexual partners at the height of the first wave of the COVID pandemic. Tsk, tsk).
Since we’ve already covered the sex toys getting porn stars off during the pandemic, we thought to include other items in our holiday gift guide, since, while sex is certainly a pillar of queer culture, it’s not everything. As RIDE’s resident blogger, I wanted to share some gift ideas that you and/or the special gay in your life are sure to love. Happy holigays, homos! From my hole to yours.
Photos courtesy of ODILE
As I’ve written many times in the past, I’m an advocate for anal training, the process of slowly and carefully expanding your b-hole for comfortable penetration. The Odile is a fantastic option, as it is the first-ever all-in-one butt plug dilator, meaning you won’t have to work your way up through individual toys that take up space in your toy box. Simply turn the key at the bottom of the device to widen it millimeter by millimeter from one inch to 1.5 inches. It’s a game-changer. I mean it.
A note from Odile: Due to production timelines, orders will be delivered in January. Pre-order yours NOW… it’s worth the wait! Shop here.
2. Commission from a Queer Artist
There are so many talented queer artists out there who will create a personalized piece of artwork for a very affordable fee (a couple of my personal faves are @heybeefcake and @beefcakeboss). Some artists may not currently be taking commissions, but many sell clothing, stickers, prints, pins, and other incredible works on their accounts. Not to mention it’s imperative we support small businesses and artists, now more than ever. Research queer artists in your local area!
Images courtesy of @beefcakeboss & @heybeefcake
3. X7 Underwear
As gay men, there’s no garment more important than your underwear. One of the best brands to emphasize your bum and package (if I do say so myself) comes from none other than legendary porn star, Rocco Steele. His underwear brand, X7, inspired by the measurements of his notoriously large member, offers comfortable and colorful underwear in four select styles: classic brief, bikini brief, trunk, and jockstrap. You may not know this, but Steele is no stranger to fashion and returned to the industry with a brand of his own after making a name for himself in porn. Shop here.
4. RIDE ROCCO Lubricants
Underwear isn’t the only market Steele has entered (wink). He’s also partnered with us, releasing an incredible and exclusive lubricant by the name of RIDE Rocco (both water- and silicone-based) with the quality you’ve come to expect from RIDE products. Shop here.
5. B Ball Uno
Prior to anal play, I recommend everyone commit to the three Ds of anal prep: dilation, diet, and douching. Regarding that first D, there’s no device better for Kegels and prepping that b-hole than the B Ball Uno from Fun Factory. It’s small, mighty, and the perfect appetizer to the main course (cock). The B Ball Uno contains a weighted ball inside that bounces and rolls every time you move. Its unique rumbling sensation is something everyone should experience. Shop here.
6. Future Method Douching Disposable Intimate Wash
Images courtesy of Future Method
Here’s something you may not know: the majority of queer men (88 percent) douche improperly. Ideally, you should be douching no more than two to three times a week. But, with Future Method’s Disposable Intimate Wash, you can douche as often as you want courtesy of its doctor-developed, pH-balanced isotonic solution, which is compatible with our body’s natural chemistry. The solution also comes with a douche bulb in the recommended size to spare bottoms from over douching. Shop here.
GIF courtesy of Tushy
Contrary to popular belief, toilet paper and wet wipes aren’t the most effective (or healthy) way to clean your bum. As a result of the toilet paper shortage during the early stages of the pandemic, people (myself included) have opened their assholes to the splendors of the bidet, of which TUSHY is the foremost purveyor. Considering the average American uses 57 sheets of TP every day (which equates to about 36 billion roles a year) using a bidet is not only good for your b-hole, but the environment as well. Shop here.
8. Tasty Hole Scrub
Images courtesy of Tasty Hole Scrub
Whether you’re none too fond of the taste of ass, or you’re looking to buff that booty-hole, Tasty Hole is a queer-owned brand that offers a collection of booty scrubs in delicious flavors like Cherry Gobler, Glazed Donut Hole, Peach Ring, and Hot Vanilla Latte to take rimming––and your booty confidence––to the next level.
Image courtesy of Clone-A-Willy
If you’re in a long-distance relationship like I am, the pandemic has kept you apart from the person you love––and their genitals. The Clone-A-Willy is a one-of-a-kind product that lets you create a vibrating replica of your “willy” (or vulva), which you can either keep, or gift to a lucky someone in your life. I’ve created one in the past, and the process is super simple. Not to mention, it’s pretty cool––albeit, a bit jarring––to be able to see/touch (possibly fuck?) a neon version of your cock. Shop here.
10. Daddy Couture Clothing
Photo courtesy of Matthew Camp + Daddy Couture
If you love the Cock Destroyers and Matthew Camp (a very intelligent and impossibly sexy man we recently had a very steamy conversation with) as much as we do, you’re going to love their online shop and fashion brand, Daddy Couture. Cheeky t-shirts, hoodies, hats––you name it, they’ve got it. Their collection includes official Cock Destroyer merch as well as tees with aspirational messages like, “Matthew Camp Topped Me.” Daddy Couture is a queer-owned and sex positive brand that proudly features models of all races, genders and body types, so it’s safe to say we stan. We stan hard. Shop here.
11. RIDE’s Collection of Premium Products
Last but certainly not least, give the gift of RIDE this holiday season. Choose from our ample selection of lubricants: Water Based, Silicone, Stroke Oil, Hybrid, Booty Buzz, Rocco, T-Lube; performance products: Rise and Rock; and grooming products: Beard Oil and Shave Cream. Stock your nightstand and medicine cabinet with the best of the best because your cock, hole and face deserves it. Shop here.
Bobby Box is a freelance writer and editor. He writes about sex and relationships and men’s lifestyle topics for other publications and websites such as NewNowNext.com, Advocate.com, Bustle.com, AskMen, Playboy, Elle, MANdatory, Elite Daily, and more.
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